Pulsating rhythm pumping on a dizzy head.

Oh, the pain, the dizziness, the oblivious.

Where nothing is revolving,

my head somehow does.

I want to return home, whatever that is,

cause my head really hurts.

Please let it be over,

cause somehow my head does.

*this was completely coined during my pre-knockout moments at Plush using my handphone, whilst sitting on the couch trying really hard to stay awake, lest i fall asleep. a thousand apologies if the grammar and sentence structure of this is just wrong but i think the essence of it is there. somehow i think it's there- enlighten me.

that feeling's coming back again.

creeping in silently, unknowingly.

but this is not the time for such entries, there are others more interesting to share. well, there is to be a massive block off starting this weekend till next thursday all thanks for the specs here in training. so it makes complete sense for everybody here to book out and stay out in where else but taipei. the same goes for me: decided to go for the study in australia education fair this saturday afternoon in taipei with some of the guys here. who knew, or at least i wasn't in the loop, lots were going taipei that night to club, and surprise surprise decided to put my name in the clubbing list.

*faints.

not that i don't want to go, but rather it's more like i'm just rather apprehensive about what to do and for that matter, what not to do there. i mean with all the boozing and dancing in the atmosphere of loud bassy music what the hell am i supposed to do. just clueless really as to the things that i'm supposed to do and all that sort of things- then again, maybe i'm just thinking too much.

i just hope i don't get too drunk,

i just want to spend more time

with people i miss most back home.

to play politics is to

deal with people in an opportunistic, manipulative,

or devious way, as for job advancement.

it would be a joke even for a fool to say that there is no politics in this world. simply, because there is. throughout the course of history, mankind has waged wars, literally and figuratively, with their own race all for the sake of advancement and progress, and you can bet your dollar, they did. if not for politics, there would be no resentment neither would there be satisfaction, and without these can we dare say that we are, then, lack of a range of emotions and thus making us less human in that sense?

i'm making this sound as if it's not the fault of humans to play politics, and at this point i do believe that that is true. the blame should be heavily put on the shoulders of mankind, only when politics is played deliberately, purposefully, with greedy intents. and for such people, they should be treated with much contempt, condemned in its full definition and for that matter be sent back to where he came from.

i do hope i have made my point clear

though i do hope you don't go home.

my blog died for a few days

but thank God it's revived again.

havent been online these few days due to the numerous outfields and details i have been going for the past few days and it's made something foreign, such as sleeping at 2300h every night, so common suddenly. frankly, it's a miracle i'm even online right now considering that i have yet another detail out to the airport at 0630h tomorrow morning.

well one good news though, the specs are going real soon and while that may sound like good news to my military ears it doesn't mean well for my personal self. cause that would mean that my bmt mates here are going home already. and that means sad goodbyes- LOL.

then again,

THE CADETS ARE COMING

and that means more friends arriving

along with more work and nonsense.

debbo sent me an email and it's really heartening to see that she's adapting well, at least to my perception, to the new environment there. but there was one thing that she said that i felt closely related to- and if she allows, she better, me to quote:

"You have no idea how reassuring

hearing from some of you can be."

the typhoon's here
so it means a day off for me

tomorrow, the madness resumes.

surfed around the blogs of the familiars and chanced upon this rather interesting entry by my senior from whom i learnt the ropes of being the gam then; otherwise known as my upperstudy in military terms; whose name is adrian, regarding yet another senior's accomplishment in the local arts scene.

kudos to ben tan and his beautiful video "Remember Me".

thank you for livening up this seemingly dormant arts scene which hardly gets much notice. that is unless things have vastly and rapidly changed since i went overseas two months ago. though i'm just sure, not even half or three-quarters certain, just sure that nothing has changed and all the industry needs right now is people like our dear mr benjamin tan.

it's still odd calling you benjamin rather than the good ol' ben tan that we used to call during those memorable wild college days. well we all got to get used to it cause an up and coming producer is coming our way!

watch his videos at: http://www.youtube.com/whimsicalworks

at least people from the arts scene win medals

others from 'other' scenes just don't

even with all those monetary incentives.

wake up your idea la.

someone's on a date today

someone asked me about mine

fact is, i don't have one. but he didn't believe me. nope not a single bit did he believe me until i told him of my situation, rather my present location to be more precise. and then he understood. he's always saying the nicest things that ears would beg to hear, but i'm still going to leave this issue to the Lord and pray for the best. but for the next couple of years i shall remain a bachelor. so for these few years of singlehood i'm going to make these days so exciting that till the day i've found a partner i can always look back and lament excessively of the freedom lost.

someone's flying off again

someone asked me when i'll be back.

fact is, i do want to join the carrier. but whether or not the Lord aids me in this, that's largely up to him but i do pray that i get the job. heck the politics and heck the tiresome nature of it, flying is what i love and flying is what i intend to do. at least for that few years until they reject the old ducks. as for when i will ever get the chance to ride in the carrier again, we shall see; though i hope it's soon. but ride in a foreign carrier i will soon. the latest would be april next year but if al goes well, i do hope it does, i may be back earlier. as to the actual dates that i will return i shall keep mum for now, so don't be too wildy surprised to be standing next to you just like how we used to in our yesteryears.

sipping on my mango crushed ice with mild-blended mango bits on top in this cafe, it's nice to reminscence on the things that i have left behind and by doing so it has only made me realised where home is and what home holds for me. the things that the Lord has blessed me with has only been made apparent in the light of all that has happened.

in the taiwan light

do i now see the singaporean in me.

there was definitely

an atmosphere of nostalgia back there.

watching the sunset as we headed back to camp from a long recce trip up the mountains it reminded me a lot of the many sunsets that i used to watch down at east coast park back home. an easterner from birth i have seen sunrises and sunsets of many sorts in all weather.

but the memorable ones were spent with my loves.

those sweet escapades to the beach were common when i was just a small kid. together with cousin debra we always brought our spades and pails and cups and other odd shapes to create our very own sandcastles right there. just two cups of sand on top of a pail of sand was all that made our day.

that, was simplicity in the sunset.

running along the sandy coasts with fellow victorians by my side we kept one another busy with the nonsense that simply could not hold us down. pacing one another on the concrete pavements, friendships grew and soon that fraternity grew. just a pair of shoes with a VICTORIA emblazoned singlet was all that we needed.

that, was perspiration in the sunset.

sitting at the table with vjchoir and the burning aroma of food lingering in the air did set the mood for heart talks. despite the wild bridging and random standup games there was always a sense of organisation, even though it was not always accompanied with sanity. finishing the night with a song of unity and strength always leaves us speechless, simply lost in the mixed emotions. just a yearning heart and an intent ear just made that moment special.

that, was unity in the sunset.

when i am back, will i get to play with you in the sands?

will i get to run with you down the concrete footpaths?

will i get to have a hearty chat of all sorts with you?

all these i want to do in the orange glow of sunsets.

24"The God who made the world and everything in it is the Lord of heaven and earth and does not live in temples built by hands. 25And he is not served by human hands, as if he needed anything, because he himself gives all men life and breath and everything else. 26From one man he made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and HE DETERMINED THE TIMES SET FOR THEM and the EXACT PLACES WHERE THEY SHOULD LIVE. 27God did this so that SO THAT MEN WOULD SEEK HIM and perhaps REACH OUR FOR HIM and FIND HIM, though HE IS NOT FAR AWAY FROM US. 28'For in him we live and move and have our being.

.

the very thing i was looking for,

Praise You Father.

let that day draweth nigh
- the blessed day where you
pass through the gates
and freedom is yours to hold;
my only regret and disappointment
is not to see those binding forces
lose its hold over you,
but to tell you in the face
how much of a friend you are;
how much of a Brother you are to me.

that day is coming soon, david.
take care and we'll meet in due time.

i really want to run

but i really need to find the motivation
will you be my motivation?

wow, i just received an email from jobscentral.com introuducing the naval engineering officer job and i was immediately reminded of good ol' david back home. wondering when he's flying off to london to continue with his tertiary studies there at prestigious cambridge and when i'd ever even see him again. now that i'm here and he's at home, the fact that i'm unable to send my dear ol' brother off at the airport disappoints me simply because i am not sure when i'd ever see him again. even when i'm back for good, he will still be there. well time will pass i'm sure and he'll be back so i'm guessing everybody's looking forward to that.

just that he'll be a SIR for a few years

and i, on the other hand, a MISTER.

smile there, kan.

i have slept for ony 14 hours in three days.

and in four days, i would have done two guard duties.

with all this training frames,

it's just a matter of time

that i faint and be ill.

on a lighter note,

mateys from home are here for their frames.

seeing them here is only a luxury

that the Lord has kindly blessed me with.

and i will treasure these times.

my stay here is only made comfortable

with the knowledge that my loved ones

and friends are safe and blessed at home.

it somehow makes all these work and frames

NONSENSE.

nonsense la you.