did you lie to me in the first place?

i just want to know.

one more day of living in ignorance.

enjoy it boy, enjoy it.

now, Mother Theresa said:
"share your food with the poor"

give me your fries now kiddo.

that nostalgia

we walked down that lane
and reality hit us.
WHAM! you ain't living,
you're in the army.

we ran down that lane
during our cadence run.
WALAU! you ain't running,
you're speeding.

we walked down that lane
slowly to civilisation.
FINALLY! you ain't dreaming,
- that's right,

you're in the army.

tribute.

this is long overdue.

to F1/ Section 4- through these 9 weeks spent with you guys, there has never been one day where laughter was not heard coming from our section. the days spent with you guys have truly been memorable with all the powder baths (brian must really remember that), all the 'wars' between prabhu and ROGER, and between brian and ROGER, and nelson and ROGER. hahaha. we endured so much together, through field camp, route marches, ippt, soc and what-nots, it's truly been a beautiful experience meeting you guys. but it was not all laugh and no seriousness in there, was there? especially after the A level results, there was just so much talk about where everybody was heading and which scholarship we were all applying for and stuff like that; in short, intellectual stuff (comparative to what we usually do in there). i really cannot say too much here in detail, lest i get charged for revealing some weird army shit or something. although i don't know whether experiences in there are considered CONFIDENTIAL or something.

okay, i'm just being plain dumb.

but really the times we spent and the stuff we went through are just so extensive and vast that i simply cannot write all of it down here. in short, the road we travelled was long and weary but when i look back now, it was simply all worth it. all because i knew not just wonderful people, but friends for life.

ABOVE. BEYOND. AS ONE. FALCON!

its been truly been a meaningful and memorable experience doing everything with you guys including all the push-ups by err-hum and yea, everything la. and so i wish all of you guys, including my platoon and company mates, all the best in your future endeavours and your unit life. for those of you guys going to command schools, be the best of what you can be and bring back the honour and glory of being a commander to FALCON COY.

the sun will shine,
the birds will sing
for us for you and me AH!
we are from FALCON COY
FALCON COMPANY AH!

pop-ed.

unit life, here i come!

(sorry ah, feeling lazy now so i'll write a proper note to my dearest section and platoon mates some other time)

okay so this entry is long overdue considering that the content of this entry all took place within a short time frame of just an hour yesterday. and as you may already have guessed and probably wondering how i did for the A's, i didn't do exceptionally well. here are my results:

B- Chemistry
C- Mathematics
C- Physics
B3- General Paper

frankly if you were to ask me how i'm feeling about my results now even after a night's rest, i must really say that i'm still rather confused over my feelings even. not that i was caught unprepared cause i scored D for chemistry, E for mathematics, E for physics and a B3 for GP and they already informed us that we can all expect a two grade improvement at the A's (which as you can see, did happen). SO i was informed and i was somehow mentally prepared for the grades really.

but what caught me by surprise really was my chemistry and GP grade. Chemistry has always been my strongest science subject and i really thought i could ace my chemistry so when i got a B, although i should have expected the B i still nonetheless thought i would get an A.AND for general paper, B3 was a grade that i really never expected to get. that to me was the biggest disappointment to me. and so when everybody in school were talking about their results- knowing where i come from, there was some sense that i let down not just myself but the school as well. ah, that inferiority complex i suppose.

i should have known better.

(thought) but even till now, i do not regret myself dropping econs after first three months. maybe PC M E was a mistake in itself. maybe i should have taken arts or done art right at the beginning. BUT then again, when i think of all these things i start to really wonder that if i didn't take that combination, S43 would never have been part of my life.

right now, i don't even know what i want. douglas messaged me last night to not worry about anything; but pray for everything. let God know what i want and still nonetheless thank Him for all that He's helped me with- which i must say was A LOT. but i don't even know what i want from this results. i suppose all of us have dreams and ambitions and right now this results somehow seems to be a stumbling block to all of that.

then again, when i think about it again if God could cause an endless supply of oil in the 12 empty jars, i shouldn't worry about how He can use my results for His purpose in me. but i guess i'm only human. i need time for it settle in and really consider what i want to do.

all i know is that i've done my utmost best in the subjects that i sat for- believed i wrote the best GP essay i've ever done; did all i could for physics and mathematics within the time frame, and i suppose that i could have done a lot worse than i did. so before i conclude this entry, let me give God all the Glory.

To God be the Glory.
show me Lord.